Confused

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

What is this feeling??
Like I don't know about myself anymore.
I'm really confused.
And I don't know what should I do.

What's the point of being here?
What is "belief" anyway??

I can't stand it anymore.
I can't face it anymore.
I can't hold it anymore.

What's the point?
What's for?

An ultimate anger...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Konnichiwa...
The truth is I really want to leave this place.
This is full of bullshit!!!

And I don't even know what the hell am I doing right here???
I don't get it at all...
I just want to be that!!!
My dreams...

Then I realize, I'm just a little bit too afraid to say "I DON'T WANT IT AT ALL"!!!!

People search for a place to fit in. I do too. But I can't find a place to fit in, neither a place that fit me in...

I don't know what I'm supposed to do!
I'm being crazy...
I can't stand anymore. I can't face it anymore.
ENOUGH!!!
This is ridiculous!

This place is full of lying.
This place is full of hypocrisy.
This place is full of inconsistency.

How can I live in it???

I just wanna go home for a bit.
Just take some rest and then I'll give my best for my dreams...
Get the hell out of here...

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Anxiety

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

GOD!!!
What I've done these two whole years???
What I've been thinking up??

How could I do something like that???
How can I fix it???

How about my future??
Truthfully, I don't really think of them seriously.
I just think about something that hard to do.
Even I know that my effort and my work is not enough to make it into reality.
How can I fix it?

How can I be so rude???
This is all about my future.
My own future.

What should I do now?
I don't really wanna lose those things.
I don't really wanna lose my dreams.

I'm scared.
So scared.

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Some efforts

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Now, I wanna skip class. Why?
There's no point of being there if I can't concentrate.
That's why I don't wanna waste my time for useless things.
This time, I really want to appreciate my precious time.
I don't wanna waste my time for nothing.
I hate to use my time for something that doesn't give a feedback for me.
This is the first rule if you wanna become discipline and wanna be success.

Then, I wanna make some money.
Wait, don't interpret it as you wish. I mean don't bend it.
*actually I don't know what I say. *LOL
I want to attend some competition, like papers competition or something that I can win it.
So, I can get the prize which is mostly money.
Just make some effort to overcome that.

I don't want to be a burden for my family.
At least I have to do something useful for them.
And I want to enlighten their financial burden.
So, this is the things I can do for them.
Dakara, ganbarimasu!!!

I know well that I'm lack of experience.
But, if I don't try it now, then when???

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Review of Books

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Ohayou...
It's soooooo early in the morning...

This time, I'll give some advice about some interesting books I had read.

1. Doctors by Eric Seagal

This book tells us about being a doctor. A living story of some doctors, since they were kids, then until they attended medical school. Then, it tells about living as student of HMS. Overall, this book tells about living as a doctor. It's a very good book. You must read that! It's so easy to understanding, and you won't be bored when you read it.
Most recommended!!!

2. Negara Kelima

This book tells us about the fifth country of Indonesia. So far, it tells us about a new country, the new Indonesia, based on history of Indonesia, it has a connection with our great story about Sriwijaya, Majapahit, Atlantis, etc. Conspiracy, crime, etc. It has a great and dramatic plot.

3. Dan Brown's novel : Angels and Demon, The Digital Fortress, The Da Vinci Code, The Lost Symbol

You all know what I mean and why I recommend these books... (^^)

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Syndroms...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Konbanwa....
It's midnight already.
But, you know, I haven't felt asleep.
Yeah, that's a pure college student...

I lost my desire recently. I don't really wanna do something.
My motivation had gone away...
I'm like a zombie, live outside, but my soul has gone away...

But, tonight I've just gained my motivation.
My energy has just been back.
And, now I'm ready for everything.
OUSH!!!

College student's syndroms and rules are:
- Don't wanna get up early in the morning
- After had exams, we don't wanna attend the class quickly
- Always late for the first class in the morning
- We are bats
- Tasks are our main dish
- Exams are our relaxation
- Meetings are our second dish
- Deadliner is a common degree for us

Well, those are realities in this world.
Don't be panic!
We can or must be exactly OVERCOME all of the matters.
For the sake of your goals....
Ganbarimasu!!!

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Konbanwa...
I haven't been blogging recently. Because I have my exams this week. Tomorrow is the last day of my exams. There are civil engineering material and statistics&probability.
Ganbarimasu!!!

By the way, in the end I realize something very important.
It has changed my point of view. It has changed my way.
Now, I become focus on my goals.

The truth is I felt so uneasy about being here.
Then I tried to take them away from me. I mean about being uneasy.
At first, I felt and thought I can enjoyed it.
But then I felt like just wasting time and doing useless things.
I can't do a proper work here. I don't give my best at everything.
My heart always feel uneasy. And my soul always screaming.
My heart screaming, I want to do something that basically my heart want it too.

Yappari, I can't give up on my dreams.
And now, my spirit, my ambition, those have been bigger.

Now, I'm heading there.
To the place that I should be there.
To the place where I'm destined to.
To the place where I'm supposed to be there.
To the thing that bring me courage.
To the thing that makes me strong.
To the thing that makes me stand.
To the thing that makes me brave.

I won't let even single thing lay on my way.
I'll crush them.

Yakusoku dakara...

My attention won't be distracted.

Now I walk on my way to reach my goals...

Ganbarimasu!!!

Wassalammu'alaykum...

An anger...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Konbanwa..

It's really late right now..
But I should write something here, and I have to do it now or never..

Did u know??
I lost my yellow jacket two days ago. My precious yellow jacket. A jacket which has millions meanings. A jacket which I got it after 3 years of my battle. And, I have just gotten a sign of my department (SIPIL UI), it hasn't been a month since then. A sign that I got it after more than a year of battle.
What the.......

How about my feelings??
I wanna punch whoever who stole my yellow jacket.
I wanna scold him or her, I don't care whoever it is.
How rude!!! He/her stole my precious yellow jacket!!!
What do you want from me??
Do you have a problem with me???
How could you do this???
Who the hell are you???

Why did you do this to me???
Why don't you have face to face with me???
Let's end our problem together.
Don't be so childish with playing like this.
It's not funny at all.

Whoever and wherever you are, I'm sure that you'll get your punishment soon.
Don't forget that whoever do something, he will be responsible for his acts.
God knows everything, even a little single thing...

Wasslammu'alaykum...

Timbul Pemira

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

konnichiwa...

Hari ini gue baru aja ikutan team building Panitia Pemira IKM UI 2011.
Lokasi @UI wood..
gila2an deh pokoknya hahaha....

sayang, koneksi yang sperti ini tidak memungkinkan untuk penguploadan foto.. hoho

Pemira IKM UI 2011
"Karena Suaramu Begitu Berarti"

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Aktivitas-aktivitis aktivis...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Konnichiwa...

I've just been back from my campus...
Why? Because in the weekends I always have something to do with laboratory.
Praktikum dan praktikum....

Bukan hanya di lab sih sebenernya. Kalo properti material ada di lab juga, tapi kalo ilmu ukur tanah a.k.a IUT kita harus ke lapangan. Jalan, panas-panas begini. haha namanya perjuangan noh.

Did ya know?
Gue sekarang ikut 3 kepanitiaan.
Lomba debat teknik a.k.a LDT 2011, Bazar teknik a.k.a baztek, sama Pemira IKM UI.
Dan di pemira gue ditempatin di bidang verifikasi coba. Oh God! Harus berkutat dengan data dan masalah administrasi nih. Dan, sepertinya gue bakalan pulang malem dari pusgiwa. hihihihi.... *tertawa yg ambigu --> gaje
So, yang pasti kesibukan hadir di hidup gue. hahaha...
Nggak ada lagi laziness in the weekend... hiks...

Hidup adalah perjuangan.
Hidup adalah nikmat terbesar yang diberikan Allah kepada kita.
Jadi, manfaatkanlah hidup kita dengan baik.
Lakukan hal-hal yang bermanfaat bagi diri kita dan orang lain.
(^^)

Dakara, ganbarimasu!!!

BE STRONG
GO FORWARD
MOVE AHEAD

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Fighting...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Konbanwa...

Tonight I have a lot of things to do.
I have to learn more about PEMIRA IKM UI.
Why?? Because I'll have my interview tomorrow.
Dakara, ganbarimasu!!!

Oh yeah. I'm joining a lot of programs that will be held in Engineering Faculty.
Therefore, I'll be so busy.
Actually, I'm busy lately.

But, they're nothing than my dreams.
I mean, my goals are still far away from me.
So, I have to do everything I can do to reach them.
I have to overcome all of this.
I know well that I'm busy.
I know well that I can lose my strength and my health can be down, but this is a fight.
All of this is nothing than what will happen to me when I reach that.
When I can stand proudly in that stage.

I really want to stand in that stage.
Walk proudly.
Do everything with all of my heart.
Always want to know about everything.
Solve problems.
Help others.
Sleepless.

The end of my path is still far away.
I don't know until when and where I can walk.
I don't know which path is given to me.
I don't know until when I can stand.

Is it the right path?
I'm not in the wrong direction, am I?

Now, all I can do is give my best.
Everything.
Even one single thing.
That's enough than nothing.

I know, it must be hard.
I know, it has a long way to go.
I know, there are so many enemies.
I know, I'm still lack of knowledge.
I know, I'm still nothing.

But, this is the path that I've chosen.
Therefore, I'm sure that I make it into reality!
Because that's my promise.
Because I'm Anissa Septi.

It must be done!

YOSH!

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Yakusoku...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

konnichiwa...
hahaha.
I have just been back from my daily activity in my campus.
So tired...

Oh yeah. From now on, I wanna learn everything necessary.
I want to improve my skill of languages too.
Truthfully, I know some of languages that used in this world.
Such as Javanese, Indonesian, English, French, Chinese, and Japanese.
But, my skill has been degenerated.
If I don't improve those, I'll be in danger because those are my precious.
So I have to protect them and use them as my languages if there's a chance.
I have to memorize them .
If I don't do that, I'll forget them soon.
I don't wanna lose my precious things anymore.
Therefore, from now on, I'll use multiple languages.

Actually, I don't know what's going on here.
What the hell was that???
But, soon I'll erase that. Don't worry.
My movement won't cause any troubles for you.
We won't bother each other.

This is my last free time.
So, in this very weekend, I have to finish everything.
My task, my program, everything involved.

I don't have much time.
Soon, I'll be soooooo busy.

I don't have ability to predict my future.
But, I'm sure that I'll give my best for everything.
Especially for my dreams.
Because I can't give it up!
I know very well that I have failed in the past.
But, that won't happen anymore, even today, tomorrow, and the days after tomorrow.
Because I'll protect my precious time.
I use them to do something better and useful.
I don't want to waste my precious time for nothing.
Time is money.
Time is life.
I don't want to throw it out.

Biggest dream.

Wassalammu'alaykum.

Brave...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Konnichiwa...

Finally last night.. Initiation.
We made it.. After a year..
Now, we are part of family..

Change to another topics..

Last night, that was our last rendezvous.
So, from now on, there's no reason to see each other.
I'll erase everything. And there's no space for anything about yourself.

I've chosen a path.
My own path which leads me to become a better person than before.
I've made my decision.
I'll go through everything so I can realize my dreams.
I have to reach my dream.
Because it's something that make me strong.
It's something that make me stand.
I'll fight to the bitter end.
I have no reason not to make my dreams become reality.

From now on, I move forward.
I'm going toward my dreams.
I know well how hard it is.
I know well that it's not that easy.
But, I'll make sure that it's going to happen.
Sore wa atashi no yakusoku.

I won't run away from everything.
I'll face it bravely.
I'll settle everything.

Because I am Anissa Septi.

Dakara, kore kara wa ganbarimasu!
Zettai ni akiramenai!
Zettai ni makenai!

Wassalammu'alaykum...

Awakening...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

konbanwa....
hahahaha...
perjuangan yang berat akan segera dimulai..
tugas yang mulai menumpuk..
aktivitas kemahasiswaan yang segera memuncak..
dan besok akan ada inisiasi untuk 2010..
finally.. we made it!

by the way, let's change to another topic....

I've decided!!!
I won't ever give up on my dream!
Not now!
I have to reach it!
No matter what! No matter hard!
Everything will be difficult from now on, but I have strength to overcome of all this matter.
Just for the pure purpose, I won't let even one single thing step ahead of me.
Just crush it! Defeat all of them!
Then realize my dreams!

I won't let it bother me. Even though you're special, but still I'm untouchable woman after all. And I know well that you aren't supposed to be together with me.
You'll have your own, and now I'll have mine.
Therefore, I won't lose to you.
Thanks for coming, but soon I'm sure that I'll forget everything related to you.

Now, in my head, in my mind, and in my eyes, there's only one single thing.
REALIZE MY DREAM!
There's no such a thing like "I can't do it!" or "Impossible".

Gain your strength!
Let's heading there!
Move forward towards your dream!
Defeat everything lies on your way!
Make your dreams come true!

Bismillahirrohmanirrohim...

Wassalammu'alaykum....

Ganti lay-out...

Assalamu'alaykum...Tadaima...Minna-san ogenki desu ka???Hisashiburi ne...

Hahaha.. hampir setaun gue ga ngepost di blog ini.
akhirnya gue putuskan mengganti lay-out dari blog ini.
ehh.... kacau balau jadinya, semuany jd berantakan.
mana ga bs ngedit lagi. makin parah....

btw, ini udah term 3. ip plus ipk gue harus makin meningkat.
tapi, kegiatan perkuliahan maupun organisasi makin meningkat aja volumenya.
makin banyak praktikum dan materi yang amat sangat susah dimengerti.
butuh usaha yang besar untuk memahaminya.
mana ini taun ajaran baru, waktunya bagi senior untuk membimbing junior alias maba.
waduuuuhh.... makin kacrut aja..
eh, tenang... november nanti gue lengser dari BEM FT. hohoho...

sepertinya taun depan gue ga akan ikut organisasi lagi.
tanya kenapa???
lo tau sendiri lah kek apa itu kuliah sambil berorganisasi.
kadang enjoy, kadang mblibet. hahaha
apalagi klo banyak proker yang harus dilaksanakan. wuiihh... ribet daahh...

btw, ima wa atashi no rasuto chansu desu..
dakara, ganbarimasu!!!

Wassalammu'alaykum...